Pass the Pees, Please

You haven’t lived till you’re way out in the country and realize nature is calling miles from the nearest bathroom.  Mother was walking with her elderly Aunt Mary when they understood they were in just such a predicament.  They were about a half-mile from from

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Joke of the day

Joe never studied his Sunday School lesson and Miss Tillie decided to shame him a little.

“Joe, did you study your lesson?”

“Yess’um.”

No Honor among Thieves

I won’t bother to lie.  That was me you saw on the side of that country road or on that old home place in the country digging up plants..and that little, bitty old lady you saw with me; that was my mama.   She’s my look out and spotter. When arrested, I won’t even be able to claim the act was spontaneous, since I keep a nice little camping shovel and plastic bags under my truck seat especially for my thieving excursions.  I’ll probably try to explain that Mother has Alzheimer’s and escaped from me, but that might not fly, since I’ll be the one out wading in the muck while she’s standing by the truck, but I guess I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it. Just so you know, I’m not the only thief she raised.  My sister, Connie makes raids just like I do.  We both make sure to get enough to share, since it’s inevitable one of us will eventually get caught.  Bud swears he won’t bail me out, but I suspect he’ll come get me when he gets hungry.  Mother is on her own.  She should have raised us better.