Dear Auntie Linda, August 13. 2015

Auntie Linda

Dear Auntie Linda,  I am a nineteen year-old-single mother of a two-month-old boy.  My husband was killed in a combine accident before the baby was born.  My baby and my in-laws are all I have.  I need to start college so we don’t remain dependent on my husband’s parents. We still live with them on a farm in Wisconsin, forty-four miles from the nearest college town.  Commuting is out of the question in winter.  I can get financial aid and scholarships to live campus housing with my son and put him in day-care, but my in-laws are insisting it would be best to leave the baby with them during the week and spend weekends and holidays with him, since the farm will be his one day.  I could commute many days when the weather was good.  Torn

Dear Torn, You do have difficult choices to consider.  While he is still an infant and you are getting into the routine of college life, it might be less overwhelming if he stayed with his grandparents and you lived in campus housing, but he might very quickly become “their child” and you’d find yourself feeling like an outsider.  Should you decide to do that, I’d stay as involved as possible, commuting mid-week as well as weekends in good weather, and taking him with me full-time, as soon as it was feasible.  It’s wonderful you have good family.  I know that little guy will need to stay close to them.  Auntie Linda

Dear Auntie Linda, We don’t have a leash law in our rural neighborhood.  My neighbor’s dogs make a beeline to poop in my flower beds.  i am tired of cleaning it up. I have complained, but it makes no difference.  What do I do, now?  Pooped on

Dear Pooped,  I guess, fight poop with poop.  Since you are having to clean it up anyway, I guess just put it back in their yard.  I wouldn’t put it on the step.  That could get nasty pretty fast.  Auntie Linda

Dear Auntie Linda,  I am getting married next month.  My parents are divorced and remarried.  They each say they won’t come to the wedding or help on expenses if the other comes.  What do I do?  Can’t Choose

Dear Can’t, First of all, better make sure you can afford the wedding.  You will be just as married, no matter how simple.  Secondly, don’t choose.  Just tell both parties, “hope you can make it!”

13 thoughts on “Dear Auntie Linda, August 13. 2015

    • I do have a real situation in my own family I can write about yet, but I may someday. My husband’s cousin had two daughters who were very close. Both married and had children. The older daughter married a wealthy farmer. They lived about two hours apart. The younger married a super guy who co-owned a struggling construction business with his father. Sadly, the younger girl died suddenly, ten days after giving birth to her second baby. The older girl created problems when she insisted she had “more to give” tha their father. He is doing a beautiful job, but his relationship with this sister is strained. Fortunately,he doesn’t have hard feelings toward the rest of us and the little ones are family.

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