Ask Auntie Linda, November 14, 2015

Auntie Linda

Dear Auntie Linda,  I am a widow on a fixed income.  My only daughter Megan is thirty-two years old.  Despite her two degrees, she has never had a job, though she puts in applications frequently, but only applies for professional positions in her field.  She never gets up before one in the afternoon.  I know she is not drinking or doing drugs, since she never leaves the house.  She just stays up all night.  Though I am her mother, I have to admit, her appearance and personality are a big part of the problem.  She wears a size twenty-two, has sloppy hair and grooming, and chatters nervously.  If I were hiring, I probably wouldn’t choose her.  I won’t live forever and am worried she will end up homeless since we struggle by on my retirement check.  Do you have any advice for me?  Near Penniless

Dear Near Penniless,  I know you are worried.  Things don’t look good for Megan.  It is time for her to take whatever she can get.  It is better to be an underemployed at a low wage than be an overqualified unemployed person. Is there anyone besides you who could talk to her?  Goodwill Industries has an excellent job training and job skills program.  She needs to talk to them.  Auntie Linda

Dear Auntie Linda, My eighty year old mother just moved in with me and my husband, not because she needs help, but because she didn’t want to invest in her aging house at her age.  She gets along fine and doesn’t require assistance.  The problem is, I don’t really feel comfortable leaving her alone when we go out of town.  She still drives and in her old community, she had friends in for coffee every day.  We live in a more rural area and don’t even know our neighbors. If she had trouble, she might not be found.  I have four siblings who say they’d be glad to have her for the weekend when we leave, but somehow, it never works out.  It’s always a bad weekend, they have other plans, or they have to babysit the grandchildren.  I worry when she is alone, even though she has a cell phone.  What can you suggest?  Mama’s Girl

Dear Mama’s Girl, Let your siblings know they need to take a turn.  Give them plenty of notice of your plans and tell them it’s up to them to work it out between themselves, otherwise you will pick one and take Mama over there yourself.  Auntie Linda

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