Upon finding her washing machine packed to the rim with freshly laundered diapers mixed with freshly-laundered gobs of poop, Mother roused Carol from where she snored on the sofa, oblivious to her miserable, bawling baby. “Carol, come here. Let me show you how to use this washer! You can’t just throw filthy diapers in it without rinsing this stuff out.” Mother got a tub, made Carol scoop the poopy diapers out and clean the washer, then sent Carol out to rinse the dirty diapers under the faucet before bringing them back to the washer. “Be sure you dump that dirty water from the tub behind the chicken house, not in the back yard. You may as well get the rest of this mess soaking.” She pointed to the pile of poopy diapers that had not yet had a ride in her abused washer. Carol looked furiously at Phyllis and me as she stormed off to do this demeaning task, clearly much better delegated to underlings like us.
We did have to tend her poor, miserable baby while she slaved over the diaper rinsing, but that was better than rinsing out poopy diapers ranging from rock-hard lumps to runny diarrhea, depending on the vintage. The stench was horrendous, as evidenced by Carol’s retching. I have no doubt Carol was sick when she came back in. She took to her bed(our sofa) to recover. Clearly accustomed to help with her baby, she was reluctant to leave her repose to wash bottles and prepare formula, preferring to call out for one of of kids to “bring me a bottle!” when he cried. The first time, Mother let the hungry little guy have a bottle, despite the fact it was an expensive, hypoallergenic formula prescribed for her own tiny baby. She quickly pointed the case of milk she’d bought for Carol’s baby, the kind Carol requested. “Oh this will be fine,” Carol said. “He likes it!”
“Carol, you need to fix your own bottles! I bought you what you asked for. This stuff is forty cents a can!” Mother explained.
Carol was clearly offended. She dawdled a bit after he finished his bottle, put him down, and shut herself in the bathroom for a good crying session. Eventually, she came out and made a collect call to her mother, insisting she come, NOW! Mama couldn’t come, NOW! More crying on the phone. We were stuck together till the weekend. Carol had no problems leaving his bottles lying about to sour after baby was satisfied. Should he cry out when a sour bottle sat handy, she had no qualms about trying to get him to take it.
The next three days lasted an eternity. At my parent’s insistence, Carol did end up giving her baby good care while they waited for Mama, but she turned him over to Mama as soon as she arrived. His bottom had healed, he’d plumped up, and even played a bit with good care. Poor little guy didn’t get much of a pass. He was soon back home to be joined by a brother and sister in rapid succession.
Alas, Carol’s marriage fell apart, but before long she found another man and launched into her addiction to having babies she had no interest or ability to care for, eventually delivering eleven sad children. At a family reunion once, I heard someone ask how long she was going to keep having babies. She replied, “As long as God wants me to.” It was heartbreaking to see her children suffer from her neglect and ignorance.
The stories told to me by women born of mothers who never wanted to marry is heartbreaking. One of my friends suffered from depression from her abusive childhood. Her mother continually told her that the only reason she was born was that a woman was expected to marry and have a child.
Carol’s story sounds like that of a woman before 1960, and one who suffered from postpartum blues.
Back then, it was looked down upon for a woman to work outside the home and pay for childcare. In fact, my mother couldn’t own a business in Florida in 1950 — it was against the law.
It doesn’t surprise me that a woman trapped in a society where her worth is determined by factors beyond her control would say that she would keep on having children as long as God wanted her to. Half of the responsibility has to go to the man, who can purchase a condom. I feel for children brought into this world because a man was “thinking” with his other brain.
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She was’t a smart woman. Both her husbands were very low on the social scale.
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How sad.
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Thank you, Sally
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Thanks.
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Oh that’s so sad. It’s really not a great idea for people to have children if they don’t intend to take care of them properly. 😦
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And you have to get a license for a dog.
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That’s funny and it’s sad and it’s true all at the same time.
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This males my heart cringe. Why have babies that you can not take care of anyway?
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It’s crazy.
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Eleven children? sigh. Do you know the story of the movie “Idiocracy” ? This reminded me.
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I will look for it.
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😦 So sad. Hopefully they are better off as adults .
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Sadly, they followed right in her footsteps.
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So sad.
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I’ve never heard of such a neglectful mother. Poor babies.<3 ❤ ❤
Did she ever get any better at mothering?
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It is tragic.
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Those children must have had good genes to survive all that. — Suzanne
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They were hardy, but live on the fringes now, just like she did.
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How sad that she had eleven children when she couldn’t even take care of one.
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She wassn’t the sharpest tack in the box.
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No, she wasn’t. She also seems incredibly lazy.
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All of that.
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Terrible. And then there are people who’d love to have children and can’t. Sad.
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Too bad you don’t have to earn humanity merits to qualify.
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