Have a Boy or Know One?

 

A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.

 

If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

 

A 3-year old Boy’s voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

 

If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 x 20 ft. room.

 

You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

 

The glass in windows (even double-paned) doesn’t stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.

 

When you hear the toilet flush and the words “uh oh”, it’s already too late.

 

Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

 

A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies.

 

Certain Lego’s will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old Boy.

 

Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.

 

Playdoh makes very convincing fake poop when stuffed in the back of a small boy’s underwear.

 

Super glue is forever.

 

No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can’t walk on water.

 

Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

A large container of baby powder can change a house forever when small boys jump on it repeatedly to see it poof out.

 

Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

 

Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

 

You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

 

Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.

 

The fire department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.

 

The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

 

It will, however, make cats dizzy.

 

Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

 

80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.

Younger siblings happily eat goat poop pellets if older brothers call it M & Ms.

 

 

Those who pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without boys do it because:

1. For those with no children – this is totally hysterical!
2. For those who already have children past this age, this is easy to believe.
3. For those who have children this age, this is real life.
4. For those who have children nearing this age, this is warning is too little, too late.
5. For those who have not yet had children, your child will never, ever do these things’
6. For grandparents of the children of boys, this is the payoff, as long as it doesn’t happen at your house.