Scary Words

Scary things I’ve heard coming out of my kids’ mouths:

To a messy neighbor:  “My daddy said you need to clean that mess up!”

To my dad: “Climb a weed, Papa!”

Comment as portly lady turns to leave checkout line:  “I was good not to call her a great big old fat lady, wasn’t I Mommy?”

To the dentist who encouraged her to floss:  My mommy won’t buy me any floss.”

Loud protest when I tried to shush my daughter in a restaurant: “He is so a fat man!”

In a grocery store:  “My mommy took my money to buy groceries.”

To the neighbor man:  “My mama’s ta tas are bigger than yours.”  Go figure.

To a kid who had been hitting him:  “My mama said I have to hit you.”  Whack!   There was a little story behind this.

To a visiting relative:  “My mama is tired of you sleeping here.”

To an elderly relative: “You smell like pee.”

To a relative:  “My mama hates your mean little dog.”

My young son to his grandma:  “Not by the hair on YOUR chinny-chin-chin!”

Worst of all:  “My mama said…….”

22 thoughts on “Scary Words

  1. A neighbor child who was new to the neighborhood continually told me what her mother said about me and my grandson. I finally asked her father to put a stop to it. Her mother was confronted by a young man in the neighborhood after a convo that I was present for when she said the boy was illiterate and couldn’t even read. The daughter told the boy what her mother said. The mother thought he found out through one of the neighbors who she was spouting off to. She denied it when I said, “Julia was standing right next to you when you said it.” She became flustered and denied that it would be her daughter. What do you expect from a woman who calls her 10 year old daughter a “Bitch” behind her back?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. My worst was standing in the queue for the till at the supermarket and my kids asking me if their father and I could give them a practical demonstration in how babies were made – they wanted to watch and see for themselves. Several other shoppers moved a lot closer for some unexplicable reason.

    Liked by 3 people

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