Advice for the Easter Season: No Baby Chicks!

Rubberneck 1Rubberneck 2repost for Easter:  Illustrations by Kathleen Swain

No little kid should ever be allowed a small, defenseless duck, chick, or bunny for a pet.  One of those four hundred pound tortoises would be a far better choice.  It could protect itself and the kid couldn’t pick it up.  Porcupines or crocodiles should be fine, too.  They could probably hold their own against a four year old.  Case in point, when I was four, Continue reading

Joke

Joe walked into a bar and saw a tiny little man sitting on the end of the bar playing his heart out on a perfectly scaled miniature grand  piano.  “Barkeeper, where did he come from?”

The barkeeper pointed toward a lamp sitting on the bar.  ” I rubbed this lamp.  A genii came out and gave him to me.”

“Let me give it a try!”  Joe rubbed the lamp and a genii appeared before him.

“What is your desire? You get one and only one wish”

Without hesitation, Joe asked for a million bucks.  The genii disappeared back into the lamp as the room filled with ducks.  They overflowed out into the street as far as the eye could see.

Horrified, Joe said, “What the Hell?  I said I wanted a million BUCKS, not a million ducks.  Is that genii deaf?”

“Yep,” replied the bartender.  “How else do you think I would have gotten stuck with this 12 inch pianist?”