‘You can always tell when Granny has had a good day playing bingo.’
An elderly lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her car. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at them at the top of her voice, “I have a gun and I know how to use it!
Get out of the car you scumbags!”
The four men didn’t wait for a second invitation but got out and ran like mad, whereupon the lady, somewhat shaken, proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver’s seat.
She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried and then it dawned on her why. A few minutes later she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags into her car and drove to the police station.
The sergeant to whom she told the story nearly tore himself in two with laughter and pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale white males were reporting a car jacking by a mad elderly woman described as white, less than 5′ tall, glasses, and curly white hair carrying a large handgun.
My lovely, kind-hearted niece, pictured above, brought her little rescue dog, Penny,over to meet me. Penny had been tossed out near a creek by some evil person, apparently in hopes she’d be picked up. Hannah left her food and water, since Penny was too fearful to be approached, baited a trap with wieners, and caught her. She was underweight, starving, and sick when Hannah got her to a vet, but is now recovering. In fact, she is recovering so well, she chased my dog Buzzy out of his food, drank his water, and bossed him around. I think it was good for him to see how a hungry dog eats. After Hannah had Penny home a couple of days, she’s dug out under fences, dominated their bigger dogs, and generally taken over. I think she may have run the place at some old grannie’s house. She shows all the signs of being the spoiled darling the kids pitched out when Granny died. I expect to see her drinking beer, smoking cigarettes, listening to gospel music, and playing video poker next time I go to visit Hannah. Seriously, I don’t know how people who abandon animal can sleep at night. I guess they don’t know about Karma.