https://nutsrok.wordpress.com/2016/01/05/the-low-down-on-lunch-with-mother/
The Most Fun You’ll Never Have, Kathleen’s Amazing Bathroom Tour!
Continuation
Once we’d gone enough miles it was unlikely we would be apprehended with bathroom destruction with malice aforethought, I pulled into a nice looking station/store. This one looked like it was progressive enough to have excellent bathroom facilities, which we sorely in needed by now, since Mother was the only one who got to use the restroom at the last stop. For neck she generously, encouraged her daughters to go first, which we lived to regret. I’d have loved to have laid the blame at her door for what we found. Marilyn, my youngest sister, rushed in to relieve her agonized bladder. In three seconds, she rushed out, “Oh, my gosh! You’ve got to see this!”
She obviously hadn’t had time to take care of any business. As mother of two teen-aged girls, the manager of a call-center, and youngest of five children, it takes something special to rattle her.
Like an idiot, I followed her in. Someone, a very healthy eater by the way, had obviously paid a visit. The nauseating smell of fermented feces greeted us as we entered the bathroom. It was horrendous, but I’ve been known to raise a stink myself.
Upon opening the stall, I saw a perfect liquefied poop sunburst splattered above the toilet. Obviously, someone in great distress had blown a gasket as just as they stooped to settle in for a satisfying moment of quality time alone. The toilet fixtures, the wall behind the toilet, the floor, and the stall wall were covered artistically with a thoroughly natural medium. It doesn’t bear thinking of the condition of that poor unfortunate perpetrator of the masterpiece as she exited the store! We scurried out to tell the disgusted clerk what we’d found, only to find numerous visitors had already enlightened her. That’s when we learned about the worst job in the world. An industrial service was on its way.
Once more, courting legal problems, we decided to stand guard for each other and use the Men’s Room. Normally, I would have been disgusted, but compared to what we’d just seen, it smelled like a rose.
To be continued.
I lost it at “thoroughly natural medium”. You always find the perfect words for a description.
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It was horrible! horrible!
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“Industrial cleaner” just hit the top of the “Worst Jobs in the World” list. Oh my gawd. That clerk should have had the foresight to put an “Out Of Order” sign on that bathroom door….if I’d been the one discovering the mess in there (literally), she’d have had to have the cleaner mopping up puke as well….You’ve just given me reason #151235 for my socially phobic loathing of public restrooms… EWWWW! And my sympathies..
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I’ve never seen a worse one!
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Plain lad puke wold not have made it a bit worse!
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Reblogged this on Nutsrok.
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I have to admire your powers of description, but more importantly, your ingenuity in finding such an appropriate feature picture that failed to turn us all away before we started reading!
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I had to work hard on that. Just posted finale of this sad tale!
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Like I said, You can’t make this stuff up.
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Just posted finale!
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Ahh, the joys of travel.
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Yes!
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This must have been the bathroom from hell trip!
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Under the circumstances, I understand fully. Anything would have been better. 😦 —- Suzanne
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You just keep making me laugh. Dear God, what is wrong with people? 🙂
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Toilet humour… Always gets me! You were brave Linda, very brave lol!!
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😆You are so creatively descriptive!
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Thanks.
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I may have hurled. And then I would have given my sister what for for calling me in to look! 🙂
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Oh, I have a very weak stomach. It wouldn’t have been good.
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It wasn’t
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Ugh 😦
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I’m far more knowledgeable about men’s rooms than ladies’ ones. I can’t help thinking, though, that it must be a rare case when the latter is more disgusting than the former. Incidentally, you were brave to enter the men’s room. I hope you had your passport.
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It was
N’t a decision made lightly.
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I’ll bet.
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