Dear Auntie Linda, September 24, 2015

 Dear Auntie Linda,  My husband and I raise beef cattle.  We recently slaughtered a prime beef and divided it between ourselves and our three children. Later, my four-year-old grandson told us his mother, my daughter-in-law fed “that old cow” to the dogs. I was stunned and asked her.  She admitted she had, saying she didn’t like beef off the farm.  We are furious, but don’t want to cause trouble between her and my son.  Their marriage is rocky and they fight like cats and dogs, already.  My son obviously has no idea since he has mentioned several times that “Susie” needs to cook some of that beef.  Meanwhile, we seethe at her insulting behavior.  Why on earth would she have fed good beef to dogs when so many people would have been glad to have it?  Insulted

Dear Insulted,  Sounds like a statement to me.  Your gift was unwelcome.  You were right not to say anything.  This couple has plenty to deal with now.  Auntie Linda

Dear Auntie Linda, We are people of moderate means.  My husband is a principal and I am a teacher.  Our son is marrying a wealthy young woman.  The wedding will be in Hawaii.  The cost of the trip, lodging, and attire for ourselves and our other college-age son already  stretches our budget.  We can afford to host a modest restaurant dinner for the wedding party. but there is no way we or our son can afford the cost of a rehearsal dinner on the scale of this extravagant wedding.  We want to share this joyous time with him and his new bride, but refuse to go into debt.  We can either go the the wedding and host a modest dinner or let her family host the rehearsal dinner, which they have offered to do..  What should we do?  Regular Folks

Dear Regular Folks, Be yourselves.  Your son knows your situation.  Go to the wedding and host the dinner you can afford.  You needn’t compete.  If the bride’s family wants something different, that’s on them.  Auntie Linda