Ask Auntie Linda, August 19, 2015

Dear Auntie Linda,  I am in an awkward situation.  My mother is in her sixties and should be retired.  I have two siblings who are freeloaders.  I know Mother has mortgaged her home to subsidize them.  About every three or four months she comes to me for money when she is in deep financial trouble.  I can’t let her lose her home, but it is infuriating to be in the position of having to continually bail her out because she has bailed them out.  She is secretive about why she needs the money, of course.  I can’t afford this, but she won’t consider discussing her financial situation with me. My wife and I have two small children and need every penny.  This is causing a lot of strife in our marriage.  Feeling the Pinch

Dear Pinch,  Your responsibility to your own family and loyalty to your marriage must come first.  It is not acceptable to expect your spouse to subsidize your mother in this way nor is it reasonable for your mother expect ongoing help.  If your mother asks help again and you feel it is something you want to consider doing, she needs to be open about her situation.  It is never a good idea to loan to family.  If you can’t afford to give the money, you probably need to think really hard.  You need to know exactly what you are working with should you decide to help.  Auntie Linda

Dear Auntie Linda,  I am in charge of laundry at our house.  I go to the laundromat at six a.m., wash and while it is drying, go just down the block for coffee.  This worked fine, till I noticed I was running low on underwear.  Maybe somebody was stealing our stuff while I went for breakfast. The next washday I counted every item before putting it in to dry and going for breakfast.  No one was there when I left.  One pair of underwear was missing when I got back.  My girlfriend laughed at me, insisting I had miscounted and that it was hilarious to think anybody would want my old underwear. You would have thought she might have shown a little sympathy, or concern, or something.  I am a guy and I have feelings.  Besides, I don’t want to buy underwear.  I can count and know somebody got my underwear.  I counted and watched again the next week.  Somehow, it happened again, with me watching for the culprit. When I got home, my girlfriend was thrilled, thinking this is high comedy.  Now I have to sit and guard my stuff.  Every time a woman walks by, I have to wonder, is she the perverted underwear bandit?  Almost Commando

Dear Commando,  Excuse me, have you ever considered equal opportunity?  Your bandito could just as well be a man!!! He He I mean Her Her (sorry)  Auntie Linda